Down and Out…

As simple as that.

Murphy’s Law version 2. Whatever bad things could happen will happen, all at the same time.

One can’t help wondering if the badness is ever coming to an end or if there is really a light at the other end of the tunnel.

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (Okay, I know the dragon is not really hidden)

 On a positive note, I ‘m still praying that all will come to an end soon.

Be back soon!

Darkest Secrets

How can we live with SIN?

This is not a post to share my belief in Christianity, but just some random and humanly thoughts I have on this word -SIN. Someone ever shared with me that SIN is the least mentioned english word in the newspaper ever.

Yet everyday, we find SIN evidently in the articles, be it in stories of betrayal, murder, fraud etc. A common word to categorise them would be SIN.

I once thought (and probably still do think) that it’s okay to live with unethical, immoral acts of mine as long as I enjoy it. Instant gratification they call it. As I was reflecting through some of the events in my life, I realised there are many things that I do not dare to tell anyone about. These are my darkest secrets. And many of them I did it with enjoyment at the time of action.

I told myself it’s okay to indulge in these SINful activities once in a while, I know I wasn’t a hardcore villian deep at heart. It’s alright to be a bit wrong just to enjoy myself once in a while, nobody’s going to get killed or anything. However, I see it in different light now.

Why do I feel ashame to even let a single soul knows about these darkest secret of mine? It’s something unexplainable, it’s just so natural within us to feel ashame of these dark act of ours, isn’t it?

While I’m glad that these are over and I got away “scot-free”, I suppose these events/acts will remain as a deep scar within me. It probably not going to haunt me everyday, but once in a while in quiet days when I look back at my life, I am going to continue  feeling this tinge of hurt, sadness, guilt and disappointment with myself. Even when “victims” of such events/act forgive, I never will. I suppose this indirectly explain what conscience is.

My sincere prayer and cryout to God is to guide me in making righteous decision in life and to free myself from the heavy burden and guilt of these darkest secrets.

Fanciful New Year

A long delayed post.

The last day of 2008 was spent at Expo for Church watch night dinner. And after that I rush down to meet Melvin and Lingzi at Clarke Quay. Was just outside City Hall when the clock hit 12 and the fireworks filled the skies of Marina Bay.

It’s been an eventful year and standing there watching the fireworks, I remembered the exact scene when I was watching the fireworks with my family at CWP in 2007. The feeling back then was so much different, filled with much happiness for the things that had happened thru out 2007. However, this time round, I’m just glad that a new year is here and I truly pray and hope that it will be a much better one.

Had been spending quite some time recently to help out with the BGB fancy drill training. It’s something that I have never expected to be so involved in. The initial plan was just to drop in and supervise what the old Boys had planned for them and see how their training goes. However, due to some reasons, the old Boys could not be involved and I thought I had better help them with the movement and trainings.

I must said this experience had been quite encouraging for me to see the commitment and passion these kids have in BBGB. It just so reminded me of the days when i was just a boy… not so long ago! *LOL! When we were all so commited and set out to achieve many things that none of us could have imagine we could.

However, today seeing their performance for the final rehearsal, was quite disappointed. Everyone knows the steps, the movement yet they keep making the same mistakes here and there repeatedly. Hopefully in the next few days to come, they will really take each practise more seriously and we may see a fantastic performance on saturday.

After this week, it’s really time to start catching up with work. Had been neglecting my work recently and it’s time to catch up and go full force for 2009! go go go!